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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25296709">when you smile i am undone</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/awashleyno/pseuds/awashleyno'>awashleyno</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Soft Eddie Diaz [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>9-1-1 (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Cheek Kisses, Confessions, Fluff, M/M, Soft Eddie Diaz, it's basically a lot of cheesiness, just... all the fluff, of sorts</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 11:22:26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,252</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25296709</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/awashleyno/pseuds/awashleyno</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Eddie can’t remember the last time he’d laughed so much.</p><p>He hasn’t stopped, it seems, his cheeks hurting with the force of his smile and his chest aching, but in such a good way. In a way that shows he’s had a good time, a fun night — that he’s <em>happy</em>. He can’t really remember the last time he’s felt this way. </p><p>If he had to put money on it, he’d bet it would’ve been with Buck, then, as well.</p><p>Or,</p><p>Buck suffers because Eddie's smile is Too Much.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Soft Eddie Diaz [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1835128</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>62</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>450</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>when you smile i am undone</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/falconbigbutt/gifts">falconbigbutt</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>a combination of a tumblr prompt and a gift for a friend for her birthday!!! she wanted buck kissing eddie's cheeks and it somehow turned into buck having a breakdown because of eddie's smile.</p><p>enjoy!!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“If you keep doing that, I’m going to scream — stop smiling, I mean it!”</p><p>

Eddie can’t help but laugh as Buck scolds him again — for what, he’s not even sure about right now — nearly fumbling his keys as they stumble up the walk to his front door. They’d not even had that much to drink, but maybe Eddie’s drunk on actually having had a <em>good night</em> for once.</p><p>

Christopher had been overdue for a sleepover at the Wilson household, which had dropped a free night right into Eddie’s lap. Which, well… if it were up to him he would’ve just stayed home, ordered food and watched shitty tv all night. But, then Buck had found out and somehow it’d wound up with them at a karaoke bar together, leaving Eddie to watch Buck do his apparently famous rendition of <em>Eye of the Tiger</em>.</p><p>

Eddie can’t remember the last time he’d laughed so much.</p><p>

He hasn’t stopped, it seems, his cheeks hurting with the force of his smile and his chest aching, but in such a good way. In a way that shows he’s had a good time, a fun night — that he’s <em>happy</em>. He can’t really remember the last time he’s felt this way. </p><p>

If he had to put money on it, he’d bet it would’ve been with Buck, then, as well.</p><p>

“Keep doing what?” Eddie asks, whipping around to level Buck with a serious look, eyebrow raised in question.</p><p>

His friend staggers at Eddie’s sudden stop, huffing out a breath as his hands fly about wildly as if to catch his balance. He’s pretty sure Buck had even less to drink than him, but then, Buck always has been kind of like a baby deer finding out its legs really <em>do</em> work.</p><p>

“That,” Buck accuses, pointing a finger at Eddie’s face, making him go nearly cross-eyed as he stares at it.</p><p>

“Talking?” He asks, his face scrunching together with his confusion, lifting his hand up to swat at Buck’s. All it does is make his friend scoff, his eyes narrowing comically, looking everything <em>but</em> intimidating.</p><p>

It makes Eddie slowly start to grin, his eyes crinkling up with the force of it, alongside the mental picture his brain conjures up. He knows exactly what Buck looks like.</p><p>

“You’re like a puppy,” Eddie teases, snickering softly, still grinning so hard his cheeks feel like they’re about to crack apart, “you’re not scary!”</p><p>

“Oh my god,” Buck groans, his head falling back, his hands flying up in the air and they’re… god, when did they get so close? Buck nearly hits him in the face as he does it, his hands making audible slapping noises against his thighs as they fall back down.</p><p>

“Sorry, is my happiness bothering you?” Eddie asks, his good mood faltering somewhat, his smile beginning to fade as he worries if maybe he’s overstepped. </p><p>

Did he offend Buck? Shit, did he do something wrong? He’d thought they were having a nice time…</p><p>

Only, then Buck’s head flies back up, so quickly Eddie doesn’t understand how he doesn’t wind up with fucking whiplash, his hands up in the air again as they whip about.</p><p>

“No, god, no, Eddie… I want you to always be happy,” Buck says, earnest, eyes wide in that serious way that makes Eddie’s stomach churn — he kind of loves it.</p><p>

“I am when I’m with you,” Eddie admits, thinking nothing of it, because it’s the truth. Whenever he’s with Buck, he’s happy.</p><p>

“Me too,” Buck answers, the smile on his face soft, his head tilting to the side and — again —  Eddie finds himself comparing the man to that of a golden retriever. Maybe Hen had been onto something.</p><p>

“I still don’t get it, though,” Eddie answers, watches as Buck’s face scrunches a bit, a mirror of how Eddie’s had been a few moments prior. “Why are you gonna scream?”</p><p>

Buck’s expression switches again, like it’s nothing, his face always so expressive and open in a way that Eddie envies. He has no idea how he does it, how he shows the world his hand so easily.</p><p>

“Because you keep smiling,” Buck says, “and it makes me want…” </p><p>

“What?” Eddie asks, his voice suddenly softer as he watches Buck’s eyes wander, trying to figure out what he’s after, what he means — why his heart is suddenly beating so quickly.</p><p>

“It makes me want to kiss you,” Buck admits, his gaze finally jumping up again to catch Eddie’s, almost hesitant, nervous, <em>shy</em>.</p><p>

Eddie’s pretty sure he can’t breathe.</p><p>

“I’d let you, y’know,” Eddie murmurs, barely able to hear his own self, but he’s pretty sure Buck is hanging on his every word, that he wouldn’t miss it even if a damn tree fell down in the street behind them.</p><p>

“Yeah?” Buck asks, smiling, soft, taking another step forward, closing the already minimal space between them. </p><p>

“Yeah,” Eddie encourages, tilting his head up, more aware now of the height Buck has on him. It’s not much, but it feels <em>huge</em> in this moment, when Buck is literally holding everything in his hands. </p><p>

He sees Buck nod, his eyes bouncing around, before he smiles again, his hand reaching up to brush his fingertips across Eddie’s jaw, slow, testing, almost reverent in a way that makes Eddie’s heart possibly skip a goddamn beat in his chest.</p><p>

But then, Buck’s always been good at that.</p><p>

Only, when Buck finally ducks down, his hand sliding over to rest on the side of Eddie’s neck, his lips brush across his jaw before pressing gently against his cheek, right at the spot where Eddie knows his cheeks bunch up when he smiles. </p><p>

It somehow feels far more intimate than if Buck had kissed him outright, the man’s thumb brushing across his collarbone as he shifts, his lips pressing then to his other cheek, lingering longer than the other, before he moves yet again.</p><p>

Eddie’s eyes are closed as he feels Buck’s forehead press against his own, his heart slowing in his chest as he relaxes into it, smiling softly.</p><p>

“I know I said stop smiling earlier,” Buck murmurs, his thumb still making slow passes against Eddie’s skin, “but I didn’t mean it. Your smile is my favorite goddamn thing.”</p><p>

And Eddie… well, he can’t help the doubt that swirls in his chest, the arguments he feels on the tip of his tongue, years of self-doubt waging war inside his chest. Instead of giving way to it, he focuses on the feel of Buck, pressed so close, warm and strong and everything Eddie’s wanted for so damn long, he’d forgotten what it felt like to <em>not</em> wish for it.</p><p>

“Good thing,” Eddie murmurs, “because I can never seem to stop around you.”</p><p>

“I hope that never changes.”</p><p>

“It won’t,” Eddie says, in earnest, reaching up to rest his hand on Buck’s chest, right above where his heart is beating.</p><p>

And, Eddie knows it won’t —  that there’s no possible world he could live in where Buck didn’t make him feel so damn <em>happy</em> and whole. Where simply being in his presence wasn’t exactly what Eddie needed to feel as though he was walking on air, to make him feel like anything in the world was possible — all because Buck believed in him.</p><p>

They should talk, he knows it, and they will. But, for now, Eddie’s content to pull Buck inside his house, to fall asleep to the feel of Buck’s lips brushing against his cheeks again and again.</p><p>

It makes him smile every time, just as he’d promised.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i'm on tumblr @ edditodiaz !! </p><p>just picture the smile eddie made when he dropped chris off with buck in 3x01 and you'll understand buck's Stress.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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